Hey guys, sorry I’m doing this so late, I have been
unusually busy. I am writing tonight to talk about the first chapter of “The
Tempest”. Now you are probably expecting me to say something about magic and or
mysticism. Normally you would be correct but something else caught my eye.
Something crude yet satisfying. As I was reading through the first chapter, I
marveled at all the wonderful expressions and jokes the characters were making.
But, that is not all; I also kept a watchful eye out for colorful insults and
the like. As I began to focus on that and the strange expressions, a whole new
world opened up to me. Turns out, Shakespeare was quite the creative fellow
when he put his mind to it. Plus when you really take the time to read through
his stuff rather slow and calculating, you find sooooo many funny things.
In just the first act of the book, we hear the comic relief
making good jokes and even greater one liners. Antonio and Sebastian as they
are setting off to leave the ship have a little exchange where Antonio says we
should die with the captain and Sebastian retorts that they should leave him. I
thought that was really funny. Then we have Miranda in act 1, scene 2,
listening to Prospero intently. Prospero asks her if she can hear him and she
tells him “your tale, sir, would cure deafness”(Act 1, Scene 2, Line 127).
That’s a great expression. I honestly don’t know how he comes up with this
stuff. I am wondering if it’s just him or does everyone have a mind for clever
retorts in his age. The insults are even better! In act 1, scene 2, Prospero is
talking about the ship he traveled to the island on by saying it was “A rotten
carcass of a butt…[that] the very rats instinctively quit it.” He is literally
saying this boat is a piece of crap that not even the rats can deal with.
That’s freaking genius if I ever heard it.
When I read through all these expressions, I got to
imagining how it would be like if people actually thought of clever insults
rather than just go the mainstream way and calling everyone an asshole or a
butthead. What ever happened to creativity people?! I want to try and start a
trend where people insult others through newer and more creative ways. For
instance, instead of me calling someone a tool, I can say you useless sack of
pig feces or you generic piece of giants toe jam. Like that’s actually genius
(hey look, I’m modest too). So, if anyone calls you a name, think of something
clever that not even they will be able to begin to comprehend. Sayonara, folks,
and seeya next time.
